Hi everyone and welcome back to another week of The Reality of a Single Mother’ series, this week we have a double feature with 2 of my favourite ladies on Instagram! The dream team that keep Kimaarah and all the other little princesses on Insta looking like absolute perfection; it’s Sam from @littleladiesboutique and her sister Jess from @madeby.jessica
Introduce yourselves …
I’m Sam, I am 29 and have two little girls aged 4 and 6 called Arabella & Milenna.
I run Little Ladies Boutique and we live in sunny Spain!
My name is Jessica and I’m mummy to Gia (6) and Lennox (1). I run my own little bow business which actually started when I became a single mum with Gia.
How did you come to be a single parent?
Sam: I became a single parent after realizing that it was less stress and work not being with their dad than it was being together. Watching him lie on the sofa whilst I was dealing with two crying babies made me so angry and upset where as if I knew i had to do it by myself I could just get on with it!
Jessica: I was working long hours when Gia was a baby which gave me real separation anxiety with her and her dad really didn’t pay her any attention which upset me a lot. Being only 20 when I had her, her dad was 21 and immature, so after a year with baby Gia it was all just too much on my plate and I decided I’d rather not see him ignore her than him being there doing nothing and me getting annoyed.
How do you get along with co-parenting?
Sam: It’s always been very difficult trying to get a routine with their dad. The girls live with me 24/7 and don’t ever go and stay with him. The only time he will see them is the occasional school pick up or for a morning on the weekends so it’s really hard on me not ever having a break.
Jessica: We went our separate ways and then along came the custody battles… after many many arguments, fights and upsets we finally got to a settled agreement when Gia was about 3. This made life much easier and let me and her father coparent very well, we regained friendship and would even take her out together at times.
When Gia was 4 I really wanted a sibling for her and as neither of us have had a partner by then we decided to have another child (no judging 😂). Still living separately and going by to our custody agreement to make life easier, all was going smoothly as possible. Then last August he went inside so now I am truly feeling the means of single mum! No help from another parent is hard. But we are okay and thank goodness for my little business I can work around and be there for them as much as I need to be!
What would you say is the best thing about being a single parent?
Sam: The best thing about being a single parent I think would be bringing them up the way I want. Arguments would start as we’d disagree on how to deal with things.
Jessica: The best thing about being a single mum for me is that I can give them my 100% attention and don’t need to worry about a moaning man feeling left out 😆
What’s been your biggest achievement since becoming a single mum?
Sam: I think my biggest achievement would be setting up my business and it becoming so successful that I can pay my own bills and provide for my daughters without having to depend on their dad.
Jessica: My biggest achievement since becoming a single mum is definitely Made by Jessica!
What do you struggle with the most?
Sam: The struggles of course are having to do EVERYTHING. It was harder when they were smaller I would be on my knees trying to stay awake through bath time. Now that they are older it is easier but it’s also pretty shit having to be so strict on them, having to be mum and dad.
Jessica: What I struggle most with is splitting myself in 2, doing all the dinner, baths and bedtime before being able to even have a quick shower myself.
What advice would you give to a newly-single parent?
Sam: My advise would be that yes it’s hard being a single parent but it’s sometimes even harder being in an unhappy relationship.
Jessica: My best advice would be have a glass of wine each night, takes the edge off the stress haha!
I want to thank both ladies for giving such an honest account of their stories. If you don’t already follow them I would strongly recommend you to follow @littleladiesboutique and @madeby.jessica where you can use our discount code KIMAARAH5 on your orders!
I hope you all enjoyed this week’s feature, stay tuned for next Friday where another amazing single mother will be telling her story!